PoonamPSB

Poonam's Scrapbook
This is the place where I will write about the journey I follow to self-realization. My goal is to gain wisdom and takes steps towards enlightening myself. I will be following the journey of Siddhartha, the title character of Herman Hesse's Siddhartha, as a model for my own journey. The steps I have taken follow.

The Assignment
To get a feeling for how the Samanas, Indian ascetics that are found in the novel Siddhartha, try to reach enlightenment, we gave up something we enjoy for a week. I chose to give up cussing, because it's technically not something I need.

Beginning of the Week
I woke up to a bright, beautiful day. I suddenly remembered that I cannot say bad words at all for a week because of the self deprevation project we were doing in English class. I thought to myself about how easy this was going to be since it was only a week and I don't say many bad words. After I got ready I went to school. I was going strong because I did not say any bad words the first two days of this project. Even though I was going strong, my "heart was not contented" (Hesse 3). Something felt incomplete in my day. It felt like there was a piece missing.

Middle of the Week
I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. It is Wednesday and normally I would be very excited but today was different. I woke up in a terrible mood and there was nothing anyone could do to change it. Siddhartha said, "The world had a bitter taste. Life was torment" (Hesse 7). At this point, I completely agreed with Siddhartha because I was not having a good day. I went to school, saw friends, and was somewhat happy but not really. Being completely not aware of what I was doing, I accidentally let some bad words slip out. It's like they were sitting on the tip of my tongue, waiting to burst out as soon as I open my mouth.

End of the Week
Finally, I only had two more days left until my week was over. I admit I did have to restart a couple of times. I was not successful with my self deprivation goal. In my head I thought to myself that these two days would take forever and that I would never make it through. In Siddhartha's exact words, "The world was indeed ill, life was hard to bear" (Hesse 12). I could not agree more with him at this point. Although, I successfully made it through the last two days without saying any bad words at all. I was so proud of myself. It really did get the hardest towards the end because I knew I was almost done which made me want to just give up and say I was close enough instead.



= Awakening = ==== The Quote: Hesse says, "the world for the first time. The world was beautiful strange and mysterious. Here was blue, here was yellow, here was green, sky and river, woods and mountains, all beautiful, all mysterious and enchanting, and in the midst of it, he, Siddhartha, the awakened one, on the way to himself. All this, all this yellow and blue, river and wood, passed for the first time across Siddhartha's eyes. It was no longer the magic of Mara, it was no more the veil of Maya, it was no longer meaningless and the chance diversities of the appearances of the world, despised by deep-thinking Brahmins, who scorned diversity, who sought unity. River was river, and if the One and Divine in Siddhartha secretly lived in blue and river, it was just the divine art and intention that there should be yellow and blue, there sky and wood -- and here Siddhartha. Meaning and reality were not hidden somewhere behind things, they were in them, in all of them" (39). ====



Analysis:
As I was reading the book, Hesse said, "All this, all this yellow and blue, river and wood, passed for the first time across Siddhartha's eyes." In my picture, the color blue symbolizes water and calmness since he was in the nature. The yellow on my sun symbolizes light and enlightenment because Siddhartha was the enlightened one. The color green on the trees and the grass symbolizes nature because that is where he was. The setting impacted the story by painting a vivid picture in the reader's mind to imagine exactly where Siddhartha is. He uses this setting to show add a significance to Siddharthas awakening.

= Kamala =



Name: Kamala

Location: I live in a grove by town.

Eyes: My eyes are "dark" and "alert"(28).

Hair: My hair is "black"(28).

About Me(looks): I am very beautiful woman. You can tell I am clever and intelligent from my "bright fair face, and...clever arched eyes" (51). I am an eloquent speaker and very good at giving advice to others through my "red mouth like a freshly cut fig"(51). I am very confident in myself and my skills. I live in luxury.

Hobbies/Profession (actions):

I spend my time helping to teach men "the joys of love"(30). 'The way you can kiss Kamala!' ..."Yes, I am good at it, and so I have no lack of clothes, shoes...and every beautiful thing,' "(pg.32). As you can see, I am proficent at my job. If you are ever having troubles with your love life, just call me and I will make it better.

Looking For (speech, effect on others):

I am looking for "young men... in fine clothes, in fine shoes... scent in their hair and money in their purses"(54). They must have "clothes, fine clothes, and shoes, fine shoes, and plenty of money in his purse and presents for [me]" (54). Although, how will I teach you anything about love if you do not have anything to give in return?

= Samsara =

Analysis:
My school week is pretty much the same thing everyday. From Monday through Friday, all I do is force myself to wake up really early to start off my day. I "felt dull and tired,"(Hesse 78) as I realized I had to go to school, like Siddhartha when he lays in bed. After that I make myself look decent for school and cry as I am driving there (mentally not physically). After I get to school, I talk to my friends and hang out with them until the seven minutes are over. Then, I head to class and as I am learning, I am also waiting for the next seven minute break where I get to see my friends again. Finally, school ends and I head home. Right as I enter my home I head to the kitchen and eat about ten pounds of food. As I am eating I also watch netflix till about five o' clock. I immediately start my homework right after and work until it it finished which is normally around twelve or sometimes later. After that I finally go to sleep just to restart the same routine the next day. Just like Siddhartha, I feel like "The years passed by. (Hesse 75)" because I follow basically the same routine over and over again it seems like the time just flies by and there is nothing I can do to stop it.

**The River**

media type="custom" key="24589196" "If I die young, bury me in satin Lay me down on a bed of roses  Sink me in the river at dawn  Send me away with the words of a love song"
 * Song:** If I Die Young
 * By:** The Band Perry
 * Lyrics:**

"...his glance fell on the river, and he saw the river going downward, too, moving constantly downstream, but singing merrily as it went. He was greatly pleased with that and smiled at the river in a friendly way." (Hesse 50) I have always loved the song If I Die Young, by The Band Perry. In this song, they sing, "If I die young, bury me in satin, lay me down on a bed of roses, sink me in the river at dawn, send me away with the words of a love song" showing how the river would be a place she would want to be sunk because it is a peaceful and flowing body of water. In the book, Siddhartha says, "...his glance fell on the river, and he saw the river going downward, too, moving constantly downstream, but singing merrily as it went. He was greatly pleased with that and smiled at the river in a friendly way." (Hesse 50) showing how he felt about the river and how it always seemed like it was singing merrily which is how The Band Perry portraying the river as well.
 * Quote from text:**
 * Analysis:**

media type="custom" key="24589438" "You can't step in the same river twice. The waters always changing, always flowing.  But people, I guess, can't live like that,  We all must pay a price.  To be safe, we lose our chance of ever knowing"
 * Song:** Just Around the Riverbend
 * Lyrics:**

"But today he only saw one of the river's secrets, one that gripped his soul. He saw that the water continually flowed and flowed and yet it was always there; it was always the same and yet every moment it was new. Who could understand, conceive this? He did not understand it; he was only aware of a dim suspicion, a faint memory, divine voices" (Hesse 102).
 * Quote from the text: **

I have always liked this song because it is just so fun to dance to. In the song Just Around the Riverbend the lyrics "You can't step in the same river twice. The waters always changing, always flowing." saying that the river never stays the same, and is continually changing. Siddhartha notices this and realizes that understanding everything about the world is very difficult, as the past, present, and future are all interconnected seamlessly through time. Before gaining this wisdom, however, he feels that it is difficult to truly comprehend the river and what it symbolizes because people aren't used to thinking about the world in those terms, that the river, as Vasudeva noticed about his passengers "has been nothing but a hindrance on their journey" (106). However, he decides to stay with the ferryman in spite of that because he wants to gain wisdom.
 * Analysis: **

media type="custom" key="24589654" "Because this water drown my family This water mixed my blood  This water tells my story  This water knows it all."
 * Song: ** Oceans
 * By:** Jay Z featuring Frank Ocean
 * Lyrics:**

"They have pilgrimages; the river has been in their way and the ferryman was there to take them quickly across the river...they have heard its voice and listened to it, and the river has become holy to them, as it has to me (Hesse 106)."
 * Quote from text: **

Jay Z says, "this water tells my story, this water knows all." talking about how water knows everything using symbolic archetypes to portray the things water can do.The book shows the topic of running water as, "holy to them, as it has to me" (Hesse 106). One thing they have in common is that the waters can talk to human, as the ocean "tells my story"(Carter), and the ferryman "have heard its voice, and listened to it"(Hesse 106). The running water represents the reflection of live and shows how nature has the capibility to do things humans can, for example communicate.
 * Analysis:**