JulieYSB

Julie Yowell's Scrapbook This is the place where I will write about the journey I follow to self-realization. My goal is to gain wisdom and take steps towards enlightening myself. I will be following the journey of Siddhartha, the title character of Herman Hesse's Siddhartha, as a model for my own journey. The steps I have taken follow.

[[image:http://s3.amazonaws.com/rapgenius/1363310460_391px-Siddhartha_Gautama_meditating.png align="left"]]The Assignment
To get a feeling for how the Samanas, Indian ascetics that are found in the novel Siddhartha, try to reach enlightenment, we gave up something we enjoy for a week. I chose to give up Vine videos, because it's technically not something I need. Technically.

Getting Started[[image:http://i7.cdnds.net/13/35/450x450/vine-logo.png width="180" align="right"]]
The first couple of days without Vine were difficult because I was so used to watching these videos. I would always go on Vine as soon as I got on the bus and after I got home from school as well. It was such a normal thing for me, so when I couldn't do it anymore I felt lost and out of place. This feeling is also portrayed by Siddhartha in the book when he says, "But he, Siddhartha, where did he belong?" (41). When I was feeling down I would usually turn to these videos for comfort but for this week I could not, and I didn't know what to do instead.

==Mid-week == After the first few days I started trying to preoccupy myself in order to not think about Vine. Whenever I had the urge to get on the app, I would distract myself with homework. This was a way for my mind to escape from the troubles I was facing. I believe Siddhartha could distract himself from troubles as well, when he "practiced self-denial and meditation according to the Samana rules" (15). On the fourth day however, I grew tired and of waiting and decided to cave in.

By the End
This challenge was difficult for me and I think I gave up near the end because I didn't have any motivation to keep going. I learned that whenever I accomplish something, I like to have something to look forward to in order to keep me going. By the end of the challenge I did not feel any accomplishment and I have just gone back to my normal routine. In this sense, I relate to Siddartha because the self-deprivation did not work for him either. He shows this is the book by saying, "No other teachings will attract me, since this man's teachings have not done so" (35). This quote is said right before Siddhartha decides to be all on his own and figure out his own way to conquer "the self". I agree with him that you can not learn certain things about yourself through teachings, you must experience them on your own. If I had to do this challenge again in the long term I might be able to do it if I had something to look forward to, but if not I'll probably just stick to my old routine.

=Awakening =

Analysis
I drew this because Siddhartha uses these colors and descriptions when describing what he saw; "Here was blue, here was yellow, here was green, sky and river, woods and mountains, all beautiful..." (39) I incorporated the yellow with the sun shining down on the mountains, the blue by the sky and river, and green by the trees and grass. This setting impacts the story because it gives the reader a visual to what Siddhartha is seeing for the first time and realizing that he is finally on his way to enlightenment within himself. This quote helps to prove the point that Siddhartha is seeing the world as beautiful for the first time and starting to appreciate the little things in life and become awakened.

Kamala
Name: Kamala

<span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">Location: I live in The Pleasure Grove.

<span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">Eyes: My eyes are brown (51).

<span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">Hair: My hair is black (51).

<span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">About me: I have a "bright, very sweet, very clever face, a bright red mouth like a freshly cut fig, artful eyebrows painted in a high arch, dark eyes, clever and observant, and a clear slender neck"(51). My hands are "firm and smooth, long and slender" and I wear broad gold bangles on my wrists. I know a lot about the pleasures of love and I am very confident with myself. I know exactly what I want and how to get it. I'm pleased with who I am and wouldn't change a thing about me. You can tell by my beauty that I have a lot of money because I attract so many men. I am smart enough to not be afraid of any man trying to take advantage of me, because love can not be stolen.

<span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">Hobbies/Profession: I am a love mistress. I like to spend my time on "an ornamented sedan chair carried by four people" (51). I enjoy making men happy by teaching them about the pleasures of love, which is why I am so rich. I am a fairly relaxed person with a lot of time on my hands.

<span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">Looking for: I want a man who has "fine clothes, and shoes, fine shoes, and plently of money in his purse and presents for Kamala" (54). You can tell by my requirements that I am a wealthy person who expects a lot. I don't just fall for anyone, you must meet my expectations. I also prefer an intelligent and wise man who knows something I don't, so that I might learn something new. I enjoy men who are "stronger than others, more supple, more willing" (73). If you have all of these things, I will accept your presence and teach you about the pleasures of love, if you so wish.

<span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">My Daily Life
<span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">1. Wake up <span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">2. Ride the bus to school <span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">3. Learn <span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">4. Lunch <span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">5. Learn more <span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">6. Ride the bus home <span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">7. Eat a snack <span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">8. Do my homework <span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">9. Hang out with my family/watch tv <span style="color: #008080; font-family: Georgia,serif;">10. Go to sleep

Analysis
Although I have a hard time getting up in the morning, I haven't missed a day of school this year or been late to a class. I ride the bus to school every morning which picks me up at approximately 8:34 and drops me off around 8:45. When the bell rings, I go to my first period class and try my best to listen and learn, no matter how tired I am. When it's time for lunch, I am so glad to have a little break. Then going back to class I feel even more tired and wanting to leave school. At the end of the day, I am so happy to get off the bus and go home, even though I usually have loads of homework. Although I dread going to school most of the time, I am so thankful to have the opportunity to learn at such a great school. I try not to take advantage of it, because someday when I go off to college, things will be a lot more complicated than they are now and I will have a lot of more responsibilities. School also makes me feel accomplished because I have a goal, to do well, graduate high school, and go to college. If I didn't have the opportunity to go to school and learn new things every day, I would feel as Siddhartha does when he says, "how many long years he had spent without any lofty goal" (83). This is said when Siddhartha discovers he does not know where he's going with his life, and sometimes I have felt that way in the summer when there is no school. No matter how hard and tiring school may be sometimes, I do not want to quit because later in life I will thank myself for having accomplished something.

The River
media type="custom" key="24520010"

**Lyrics:**
"In the middle of the night I go walking in my sleep From the mountains of faith To the river so deep I must be looking for something Something sacred I lost"

**Quote from the text:**
"It seemed to him as if the river had something special to tell him, something which he did not know, something which still awaited him." (100).

**Analysis:**
I found this song when I searched for "river" on YouTube and turns out, I've heard it before. In the song the artist states how he is looking for something that he lost in the river. This relates to Siddhartha because Siddhartha also lost his identity and his goal in life and found it when he was about to drown himself in the river. The river in both cases acts as a symbol that intrigues the characters and makes them want to be near it.

media type="custom" key="24520312"

**Lyrics:**
"So what are you waiting for? What do you have to lose? Your insecurities try to alter you

You know you're made for more So don't be afraid to move Your faith is all It takes in you You can walk on the water too"

**Quote from the text:**
"Never had a river attracted him as much as this one." (100)

**Analysis:**
I found this song when I searched for "water songs" on YouTube. I think it relates to Siddhartha well because he lost faith in himself when he discovered the awful person he had become. However, by just one single word, Siddhartha was able to reevaluate his decision and believe in himself, which is what this song is about. After Siddhartha regained his faith, he was able to see the river for what it really was, and did not want to leave it because it attracted him. media type="custom" key="24520484"

**Lyrics:**
"there is always a way out there’s always an escape if you find yourself surrounded don’t you dare close your eyes to faith"

**Quote from the text:**
"At that moment, when the sound of Om reached Siddhartha's ears, his slumbering soul suddenly awakened and he recognized the folly of his action." (89)

**Analysis:**
This was my favorite song out of all the ones that I chose because it was very peaceful and related the most to Siddhartha. After spending so much time in the Pleasure Grove, Siddhartha forgot about his faith and thought there was no way out of his misery except for death. However, this song explains how there is always a way out and an escape but you can't close your eyes to faith. Siddhartha heard the sound of Om right at that moment before he drowned himself in the river and this allowed him to remember his faith, which saved his life. I believe there is a plan for everyone and if you are meant to keep living, faith will make sure it happens.

=Works Cited= Hesse, Herman. //Siddhartha//.