AmandaDSB

=Amanda's Self-Realization Digital Scrapbook = =This is the place where I will write about the journey I follow to self-realization. My goal is to gain wisdom and take steps towards enlightening myself. I will be following the journey of Siddhartha, the title character of Herman Hesse's Siddhartha, as a model for my own journey. The steps I have taken follow. =

=With The Samanas = == The Assignment == ==To get a feeling for how the Samanas, Indian ascetics that are found in the novel Siddhartha, try to reach enlightenment, we gave up something we enjoy for a week. I chose to give up coffee, because it's technically not something I need. Technically. ==

Getting Started In the beginning it was kind of difficult because I was used to drinking orange juice in the morning but I couldn't have it because I could only drink water. I was also used to drinking some kind of soda with dinner but instead I had water. The first day was hard because the night before my mom and I went to McDonald's and we both got some sweet tea. The next day when I started giving up any drink other than water, I had to give the rest of my sweet tea to my mom. "Siddhartha gave away his robe to a poor Brahman on the road." (Hesse 7). I had an experience like Siddhartha in the way that I had to give my tea away and he gave his robe away.

Mid-Week
By mid-week, it was getting worse and I hated it. I was on a field trip the visited colleges and at the colleges when we would eat, they had drinks like cappuccinos and soda and juice, but I couldn't have any of it which made me really upset. I almost gave in during that trip but I willed myself to keep going and get water instead of one of the other delicious drinks. Also, when I had to wake up early one morning for the field trip, I wanted some warm coffee really badly, and it didn't help that they had free coffee and a coffee machine in my hotel room. Another time that day that really got to me was, I went to a party that was outside later that night and it was really cold. They had hot chocolate to drink, but instead, I drank water. I saw all these other people drinking these drinks and it reminded me of how Siddhartha reacted when he saw other people who had things that he gave up, "...his mouth twitched in contempt when he passed through a town with well dressed people." (7).

By The End  By the end, I was pretty much dying of drinking water all the time, ironically, because water is good for you. I was so looking forward to Tuesday when I could have coffee and juice in the morning, and sweet tea if I wanted it. People were still offering me drinks and I had to turn them down. "...they were offered food..." (14). Siddhartha was offered food, of course he could have some but I was offered my favorite Gatorade one time during that week and I had to tell the person that I didn't want it. I was also harder not to give up because even though Tuesday was only one or two days away, it seemed like it would be forever before it was actually here. I learned that even though I drink water almost daily, it's nice to have something other than water every once in a while. I might be able to do this again, but probably not any longer that I did this time. Even though I might be able to do it again, I wouldn't want to.

= Awakening =

The Quote
What does Siddhartha's "Awakening" look like? Is this the same thing as reaching Enlightenment? In the text, Siddhartha becomes awakened to the world around him after leaving the Samanas and Gotama (the Buddha). He sees "the world for the first time. The world was beautiful strange and mysterious. Here was blue, here was yellow, here was green, sky and river, woods and mountains, all beautiful, all mysterious and enchanting, and in the midst of it, he, Siddhartha, the awakened one, on the way to himself. All this, all this yellow and blue, river and wood, passed for the first time across Siddhartha's eyes. It was no longer the magic of Mara, it was no more the veil of Maya, it was no longer meaningless and the chance diversities of the appearances of the world, despised by deep-thinking Brahmins, who scorned diversity, who sought unity. River was river, and if the One and Divine in Siddhartha secretly lived in blue and river, it was just the divine art and intention that there should be yellow and blue, there sky and wood -- and here Siddhartha. Meaning and reality were not hidden somewhere behind things, they were in them, in all of them" (39).

My Response
I drew my picture the way I did because, when I was reading the part in the in the book where it describes what he was seeing, this is what I pictured that it looked like. When it said "here was blue", I pictured some type of body of water that was blue. It also said "here was yellow" and I thought of a sun. "Here was green", I saw a tree. "Sky and river, woods and mountains", so in my picture, I put a sky with clouds, a blue river, a tree for the woods, and some mountains in the background.

I think that the author said that Siddhartha saw water because, water as a symbolic archetype means rebirth or big changes and Siddhartha changed his mind about life and so it was almost like a rebirth and it was definitely a big change. I think Hesse chooses green because, the symbolic archetype meaning for green is nature/growth. Siddhartha is surrounded by nature and he is going through a growing period. He used blue because it stands for calm, tranquil, and positive. At this point, I think that Siddhartha is very calm. Also, he used yellow which means, wisdom, or enlightenment. During this point, Siddhartha is at a point of enlightenment. = = =Kamala= = **Name**: Kamala= = = = = **About Me (looks):** I have a fair, soft, clever face. My lips are a bright red like a "newly opened fig"(28). My eyebrows are painted in the form of high arches. My neck is long and fair. Also, my hands are fair. I am beautiful and my face is lovely (29). **Hobbies / Profession (actions):** I teach people about love. "...he learned that it was the grove of Kamala, the renowned courtesan,..." (29). **Looking For (speech, effect on others) :** I am looking for a man with handsome clothes, good looking shoes, and a lot of money in his purse. I also like men who bring me gifts. (30). Some people think that I may be greedy and have very high expectations, but I just like to think of it as being refined in what kind of men I choose.
 * Location:** I live in a beautiful grove just outside of town. (28)
 * Eyes**: My eyes are dark, clever, and alert. (28)
 * Hair**: My hair is black. (28)

**Samsara**

My Daily Life
1. Wake up 2. Get out of bed 3. Eat Breakfast 4. Get dressed and ready for school 5. Ride the bus to school 6. School 7. Go home 8. Do homework 9. Eat dinner 10. Talk with friends 11. Go to sleep

Analysis
// After you have your routines and your comic strips, explain your comic strip here. Compare your life and routines to those of Siddhartha. Do you think your routines have a positive or negative effect on your life? //

I think my life is mostly routine. I wake up and do things to get ready before heading off to school. Once I get to school, I either have Red Day or Blue Day classes. After going through the same classes at school and having lunch there, I come home and work on homework. Then when my mom gets home, we eat dinner around the same time as always. After dinner, I either finish homework or just relax and talk with friends. Then unless I don't have school the next day, I go to bed around the same time. Since I usually do the same things everyday it seems like I don't even think about doing them, they just kind of come naturally. That can be a good and bad thing. Good, because I don't really have to worry about what I gonna do next, I just do it. Bad, because since it's such a routine, things sometimes end up getting blurred together, and it's easier to forget little things. Also, time seems to sometimes just disappear when I do things that aren't in my normal routine "the years [pass] by... [and I] hardly [notice] their passing" (75)., Sometimes though, it can be nice that things blur together, because the more important things and the more enjoyable moments stick out unlike the small, little, everyday details.

=**The River**=

=media type="custom" key="24651976"= = = = Song: "Cry me a River" by Justin Timberlake = Lyrics: "You were my sun You were my earth"

Quote from the text: "By that river he halted, lingering hesitantly on its bank." (47)
 * Analysis: In the song, Justin says that this girl is his **** "sun" and his "earth". It's almost as if he is saying that girl is his everything. It seems that the river is everything to Siddhartha. He keeps coming back to the river no matter what, even if it means leaving Kamala. This is the only song that I can think of that has to do with a river and I really like it.  **

media type="custom" key="24652074" Song: "They said a Storm was coming" by Jamie's Elsewhere Lyrics: "But it seems that I have sank Because of my past actions And mistakes that I have made And attempts to evade all The consequences now Being washed away" Quote from text: "He looked down and discovered that he was totally imbued with the desire to let himself go and sink in that water." (47) Analysis: In the song it says "But it seems that I have sank", this relates to Siddhartha because he wants to sink into the river. The artist is saying that they "sank, Because of my past actions", and at this point Siddhartha seems to be reflecting on his life and what he has done and decides he just wants to sink into the river. media type="custom" key="24653926" Song: "The Flood" by Of Mice and Men Lyrics: "This world it needs a cleansing, removing all its filth" Quote from text: "This was the great fit of vomiting he had longed for: death, the shatter Song: "The Flood" by Of Mice and Men Lyrics: "This world it needs a cleansing, removing all its filth"

Quote from text: "This was the great fit of vomiting he had longed for: death, the shattering of the mold that he hated! Let the fish devour him, that dog Siddhartha, that lunatic, that corrupt, decayed body, that flaccid, misused soul! Let the fish and crocodiles devour him, let the demons tear him apart!" Analysis: The song says that "This world it needs a cleansing, removing all its filth", and it sounds that the way Siddhartha is describing himself, he sees himself as filth. He calls himself a "decayed body" and says "let the demons tear him apart", a decaying body is very filthy and gross, the song says that the world needs "removing all its filth". This song is very relatable to Siddhartha. The River cleanses Siddhartha, its running water and he always goes back to it when he is confused or thinking about his life. It makes things clear to him.