SelenaFSB

Selena Feng's Scrapbook ==This is the place where I will write about the journey that I will follow to self-realization. My goal is to gain wisdom and take steps towards enlightening myself. I will be following the journey of Siddhartha, the title character of Herman Hesse's __Siddhartha__ as a model for my own journey. The steps I have taken follow. ==

=With the Samanas =

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===To get a feeling for how the Samanas, Indian ascetics that are found in the novel //Siddhartha //, try to reach enlightenment, we gave up something we enjoy for a week. I chose to give up Facebook, because I really don't need it for anything other than contacting people. In truth, I do enjoy chatting with friends on Facebook; however, it is not a necessity for me, and thus is a viable option for this project. ===

Getting Started
==The first few days of deprivation were surprisingly easy, at least compared to what Siddhartha went through because unlike him, who "only ate once a day and never cooked food. He fasted for fourteen days" (Hesse 13), I didn't give up something essential for life. In addition, I was not in a particularly social mood anyway, so I had no desire to go on Facebook. I was slightly bored for quite a bit of time, but because I was not distracted by my friends I worked more efficiently... for a few days, at least. ==

Mid-Week
==The boredom was more pronounced in the middle of the week. After finishing the brunt of my homework and getting tired of the monotony of life in general, I briefly entertained the idea of checking my messages and perhaps chatting with a few friends. However, knowing that I needed to make it through the week without going on Facebook, I abstained, and felt rather proud of my self-control. As Siddhartha learned about self-denial "through pain, through voluntary suffering and conquering of pain, through hunger, thirst, and fatigue" (15), I found a way to curb my restlessness of having nothing particularly interesting to do. ==

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==On day 5 I was forced to log onto Facebook because I needed to send an urgent message to a friend about homework, and had no other way to communicate with her. However, after I figured out what I needed to do for the assignment, I promptly logged off, and did not visit the Facebook website for another week. Through my harrowing journey, I found out that I only use Facebook as a way to relieve my boredom from the mundanities of life. Self-denial in my case was relatively painless, mostly because I never really needed the website to go about my day. Facebook is, however, something that I occasionally enjoy utilizing. Therefore, I see no use in restraining my use of the site, and will leave that to the people who think that by not using Facebook, they will somehow gain important knowledge about the world. As Siddhartha said when Govinda claimed that had they stayed with the Samanas, Siddhartha would have learned how to walk on water, "I have no desire to walk on water, said Siddhartha. Let the old Samanas satisfy themselves with such arts" (Hesse 24). ==

=Awakening =

The Quote
==What is "Awakening"? From Siddartha's experience, it appears to be different from reaching Enlightenment. In the text, Siddhartha becomes awakened to the world and his "self" after leaving the Samanas, Gotama (the Buddha), and his friend Govinda. He begins to notice the world around him, and sees that "the world was beautiful, strange and mysterious. Here was blue, here was yellow, here was green, sky and river, woods and mountains, all beautiful, all mysterious and enchanting, and in the midst of it, he, Siddhartha, the awakened one, on the way to himself. All this, all this yellow and blue, river and wood, passed for the first time across Siddhartha's eyes. It was no longer the magic of Mara, it was no more the veil of Maya, it was no longer meaningless and the chance diversities of the appearances of the world, despised by deep-thinking Brahmins, who scorned diversity, who sought unity... Meaning and reality were not hidden somewhere behind things, they were in them, in all of them" (39). ==

Analysis
==Siddhartha specifically saw the colors blue and yellow during his awakening, presumably from the sun and water or river. When I read this passage, I imagined him standing in a lush forest, looking through the towering trees and emerald grass at a winding aqua river with the golden sunlight staining everything with a light yellow tint. As was depicted in the novel, "here was blue, here was yellow, here was green, sky and river, woods and mountains" (39), which prompted me to draw the river, the bright yellow sun, and a forest with green grass. ==

=Kamala =

Name: <span style="color: #ee1111; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">Kamala
==<span style="color: #800000; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Location: <span style="color: #ee1111; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">I live in the Pleasure Grove == ==<span style="color: #800000; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Eyes: <span style="color: #ee1111; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">My eyes are dark brown (pg. 51). == ==<span style="color: #800000; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Hair: <span style="color: #ee1111; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">My hair is black (pg. 51). ==

<span style="color: #800000; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">About Me:
==<span style="color: #ee1111; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">I am intelligent and elegant, as well as wealthy and beautiful. I am confident in myself and my appearance, as I have "a bright, very sweet, very clever face, a bright red mouth... artful eyebrows painted in a high arch, dark eyes, clever and observant" (51). My eyes indicate my intellectual ability, and my red lips show that I am very passionate. ==

<span style="color: #800000; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Hobbies/Profession:
==<span style="color: #ee1111; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">I am a courtesan for "many young men... including Brahmin's sons" (54). I am a mistress in the art of love, and am well-learned in the act of lovemaking. I spend my time courting various visitors, giving advice to less fortunate people, and listening to flattering poetry. With my profession, I am able to buy all the clothes and shoes that I desire. From these activities, I seem like a material, and rather vain person. ==

<span style="color: #800000; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Looking For:
==<span style="color: #ee1111; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">I am looking for a sophisticated partner, someone who is intelligent and wealthy. This man "must have clothes, fine clothes, and shoes, fine shoes, and plenty of money in his purse and presents [for me]" (54). These requirements show that I am very material, and appreciate appearances and wealth over inner beauty and personality. ==

=<span style="color: #80006c; font-family: Copperplate,'Copperplate Gothic Light',fantasy;">Samsara =

<span style="color: #5f0080; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Quote from Siddhartha
==<span style="color: #ab247c; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">Siddhartha, who was once a Samana, changed his lifestyle after meeting Kamala, the courtesan in the lovely pleasure garden. He began acting like ordinary people did, and "had learned how to transact business affairs, to exercise power over people, to amuse himself with women; he had learned to wear fine clothes... he had learned to eat sweet and carefully prepared foods... he had learned to play dice and chess... to sleep on a soft bed" (77). With these new activities, he acquired some of the characteristics of normal people, and became restless and anxious, wanting something, but not knowing what he really wanted, or how to obtain it. ==

<span style="color: #5f0080; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">The Comic
(from Pixton.com)

<span style="color: #5f0080; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Analysis
==<span style="color: #ab247c; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">My life is somewhat routine, in terms of my actions, at least. I do the same things every week, at the same times, yet when I am at those events, I am always learning new things or figuring out something that I didn't know before. My days start with me waking up; the time depends on the day. I normally get up around 7:40-8:00, then get ready for school. At school I go to my classes, diligently working on whatever the teacher assigns (unless something more interesting captures my attention), and talk with friends. After school, I often have extracurricular activities that I participate in. When I finally get home, I finish my homework, play flute, occasionally do something fun when I have some free time, and eventually go to sleep. These patterns provide structure to my life, which is helpful when my schedule is packed. And, because I am always thinking about things, my life is not extremely dull. Sometimes I fall into ruts where I am lazy and unproductive, as Siddhartha became after living in the village. However, like he was in the beginning of his life as a rich man, I have "always felt different from and superior to the others [in the village]; ... always watched them a little scornfully, with a slightly mocking disdain..." (77). I always manage to bounce back and resume my life of thinking and working. ==

=<span style="color: #00ffff; font-family: Copperplate,'Copperplate Gothic Light',fantasy;">The River =

=<span style="color: #0c0776; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">River - Emeli Sandé =

media type="custom" key="24520114"

<span style="color: #016c65; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Quote from the text:
==<span style="color: #6a92bb; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">"Never had he found the voice and appearance of flowing water so beautiful. It seemed to him as if the river had something special to tell him, something which he did not know, something which still awaited him" (100). ==

<span style="color: #016c65; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Analysis:
==<span style="color: #6a92bb; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">In the song River, she is singing about how she will help the listener, and provide guidance. In the novel, Siddhartha believes that the river wants to tell him something about life, and help him find wisdom, much as the singer is offering to do. The river symbolizes wisdom and knowledge, things that Siddhartha craves, thus influencing his decision to stay wit Vasudeva, the ferryman, and learn from the flowing water. Vasudeva particularly loves the river, and said when he first met Siddhartha, "I love it [the river] above everything... One can learn much from the river" (49). Siddhartha, too, believes that there are many things that can be understood by listening to the river. ==

=<span style="color: #0c0776; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Around the Riverbend - Pocahontas (Disney) = media type="custom" key="24520132"

<span style="color: #016c65; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Quote from the text:
==<span style="color: #6a92bb; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">"But today he only saw one of the river's secrets, one that gripped his soul. He saw that the water continually flowed and flowed and yet it was always there; it was always the same and yet every moment it was new. Who could understand, conceive this? He did not understand it; he was only aware of a dim suspicion, a faint memory, divine voices" (102). ==

<span style="color: #016c65; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Analysis:
==<span style="color: #6a92bb; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">In the song, the river never stays the same, and is continually changing. Siddhartha notices this and realizes that understanding everything about the world is very difficult, as the past, present, and future are all interconnected seamlessly through time. Before gaining this wisdom, however, he feels that it is difficult to truly comprehend the river and what it symbolizes because people aren't used to thinking about the world in those terms, that the river, as Vasudeva noticed about his passengers "has been nothing but a hindrance on their journey" (106). However, he decides to stay with the ferryman in spite of that because he wants to gain wisdom. ==

=<span style="color: #0c0776; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">River of Dreams - Billy Joel = <span style="color: #0c0776; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif; line-height: 0px; overflow: hidden;">media type="custom" key="24520318"

<span style="color: #016c65; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Quote from the text:
==<span style="color: #6a92bb; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">"In his heart he heard the newly awakened voice speak, and it said to him: "Love this river, stay by it, learn from it." Yes, he wanted to learn from it, he wanted to listen to it. It seemed to him that whoever understood this river and its secrets, would understand much more, many secrets, all secrets" (101-102). ==

<span style="color: #016c65; font-family: 'Avant Garde',Avantgarde,'Century Gothic',CenturyGothic,AppleGothic,sans-serif;">Analysis:
==<span style="color: #6a92bb; font-family: Papyrus,fantasy;">The singer feels that he can learn something vital from the river, and therefore spends his nights travelling to this body of water to try to obtain whatever knowledge or wisdom he thinks the needs. Siddhartha is the same way, appreciating the potential of the river to help him on his quest to figure out what life is truly about. Siddhartha stays by the river because he "wanted to learn from it, he wanted to listen to it". Both the singer and Siddhartha believe that "whoever understood this river and its secrets, would understand much more, many secrets, all secrets", including what they perceive to be missing from their lives. ==