EllieBSB

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=  Ms. Riddle's Self-Realization Digital Scrapbook =

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This is the place where I will write about the journey I follow to self-realization. My goal is to gain wisdom and takes steps towards enlightening myself. I will be following the journey of Siddhartha, the title character of Herman Hesse's Siddhartha, as a model for my own journey. The steps I have taken follow. ======

[[image:driddle10h/tvellie.jpg width="237" height="166"]]
To get a feeling for how the Samanas, Indian ascetics that are found in the novel Siddhartha, try to reach enlightenment, we gave up something we enjoy for a week. I chose to give up TV, because it is not something I technically need. Technically!

Getting Started-
The start of the week was hard for me because watching TV was something I always did in my free time. It was like when Siddhartha started it, it was a new journey just like it was for me. It was a hard first days; I kept my eyes on the goal. I felt empty inside and ended up watching my wall instead of reading because I was so bored. I was like Siddhartha with "One goal was Siddhartha's and only one: to become empty," (Hesse 7). This challenge made me think the purpose of this project was to be empty and be bored with nothing to do. It was not too bad on Wednesday and Thursday because I had homework and volleyball so I did not have too much time. Later at night though, when the Big Bang Theory came on I had to lock myself in my room because I was tempted to go out and watch it with my family. It was hard to resist the temptation of watching Sheldon and his nerdy self.

Mid-Week- The middle of the week Friday and Saturday were awful. I had a lot of free time over the weekend. During those two days I figured out how much TV I watch. On Friday you could say I went to bed extremely early because what else was I going to do when my family was catching up on the show The Voice. My parents teased me a lot over the week and would try to get me to watch TV. My brother, you got to love him but he got on my nerves, he started to come in my room and say "Ellie come out and watch some TV with me, oh wait you can't." He would run out of the room laughing. Saturday I ended up running and riding my bike for most of the day and exercising. Siddhartha had a hard time adjusting like I did; I caught myself grabbing the remote to turn on the TV. It almost hurt "Truly the breath in my chest ached me then." Those two days were miserable and painful almost to me; I almost died of boredom I swear to you. I mean what else was I going, do my homework. No thank you!

End of week- Things became almost peaceful in a way. I was not lying in my bed looking at the fan go around and around with my mouth open. I was actually not missing it too much. It became easier to stay away and not watch the TV. It also could have been that my brother was at his friend's house. I didn't walk by the TV anymore with a pained look on my face. I felt like my normal self. I felt like him with "Siddhartha's soul returned it had died, it had fallen into dust." This is saying that like me he has become his normal self. THE IMAGE! The quote: "the world for the first time. The world was beautiful strange and mysterious. Here was blue, here was yellow, here was green, sky and river, woods and mountains, all beautiful, all mysterious and enchanting, and in the midst of it, he, Siddhartha, the awakened one, on the way to himself. All this, all this yellow and blue, river and wood, passed for the first time across Siddhartha's eyes. It was no longer the magic of Mara, it was no more the veil of Maya, it was no longer meaningless and the chance diversities of the appearances of the world, despised by deep-thinking Brahmins, who scorned diversity, who sought unity. River was river, and if the One and Divine in Siddhartha secretly lived in blue and river, it was just the divine art and intention that there should be yellow and blue, there sky and wood -- and here Siddhartha. Meaning and reality were not hidden somewhere behind things, they were in them, in all of them" (39). Analysis: I drew the scene how I had it in my head. I drew the scene how I saw it from reading the quote. I did a lot of " yellow" in the picture because that is how Siddhartha sees it. I did the trees around the river because he says how there were many woods. Siddhartha saw the world for this first time, and he saw the beauty in it. I think they used this scene because it is a very peaceful setting and makes you feel at ease.

Kamala Name: Kamala Location: I live in a big town near the very beautiful river. Eyes: My eyes are "dark eyes clever and alert" (28). Hair: My hair is "high-piled black hair" (28).

What I look like: I have dark hair with brown eyes. I am considered very beautiful with my stunning features. I have a "very soft, very clever face," (28). People all come to me and tell me how beautiful I am. I have many men following after me. Hobbies/ Profession: I teach the world of love, and how to love. I am a very good teacher and people want to learn from me. Siddhartha says to me "I am already beginning to learn from you. Even yesterday I learned something from you," (30). Many men follow me everywhere and follow my rule. They want to learn from the beautiful Kamala, how to love. Looking for: I want someone to love, and someone that can understand how important your appearance is. A man must have "clothes, handsome clothes , and shoes, good-looking shoes, and a lot of money in his purse, and gifts for Kamala," (30). The men must have a sharp and good-looking appearance for them to capture my heart and eye.

SAMSARA 1. I turn of alarm 2. I take my medicine 3. I get on bus 4. I go through my boring school day 5.I do my homework 6. I go to weight lifting 7. I sleep. My day is the same pretty much every day. I wake up at about 7: 40 and then go to the bus stop. I wait at the bus stop for about ten minutes. The bus ride is very long and aggravating at times. When I get to school I go the breezeway and hang. The school day goes by somewhat fast and I love my teachers and classes so it's a fun day. I then go home and work on my homework for about an hour before I have to leave for weight lifting or volleyball practice. When I get home I finish my homework. I then eat a bowl of cereal because like Siddhartha I "felt a ravenous hunger" (46). I then go to bed very sore and tired. Siddhartha day is also very physically and mentally tough. The day does go by very fast. Before I know it I'm waking up for the same thing the next day

. Song: Blue River By: Elvis Presley media type="custom" key="24583208" Lyrics: Blue river, it can't be found on any map that I know But it's the place where lonely lovers all go To cry their tears, blue river It winds along a path of heartache and pain Of broken dreams from lovin' someone in vain Like I loved you, and baby I still do I held you so tight You were out of my sight I'm feelin' so low But I gotta go Blue river because you never really cared about me  From now on baby that's where I'm gonna be  Cryin' over you, by the river of blue

Quote: ""Things are going down for me!" he said to himself, laughing the while; and, as he said this, his glance fell on the river, and he saw the river going downhill, too, moving constantly downstream, but singing merrily as it went," (51). Analysis: Siddhartha though his life was going downhill. The song relates to the story Siddhartha because in the song he felt like the river didn't care about him. SIddhartha also feels this way, that nobody cares about him. He then looked "and saw the river going downhill,too," like Siddhartha.

Love is a lonesome river By: Glen Campbell I find That love is a lonesome river running through the lonesome mind I took a plane to back when I was just a child that played Time sure changed this old town oh it's not the same today As I try to meet old friends none do I find Cause love is a lonesome river running through the lonesome mind There's trees along this river that are overgrown with pines There's pools along this river where the sun will never shine As I look into my heart and count my loss I find That love is a lonesome river running through the lonesome mind Yes love is a lonesome river running through the lonesome mind

Quote: "but that he had regained consciousness by a river, under a coconut palm, the sacred word om on his lips; he had then fallen asleep, and now, awake again, he was looking at the world like a new person," (48).

Analysis: The song I feel like fits this quote. Siddhartha is upset because he feels like he doesn't know himself again. He went to the river crying and upset about everything. He felt so alone. He fell asleep and woke up next to the river. He woke up realizing that there was no reason to be upset about anything and that he should be happy. This song shows how Siddhartha felt when he got to the the river. He was upset when he left Kamala. When he woke up Siddhartha felt like "he was looking at the world like a new person," (48).

Big River By: Johnny Cash media type="custom" key="24583530" Now I taught the weeping willow how to cry, And I showed the clouds how to cover up a clear blue sky. And the tears that I cried for that woman are gonna flood you Big River. Then I'm gonna sit right here until I die. I met her accidentally in St. Paul (Minnesota). And it tore me up every time I heard her drawl, Southern drawl. Then I heard my dream was back Downstream cavortin' in Davenport, And I followed you, Big River, when you called. Then you took me to St. Louis later on (down the river). A freighter said she's been here but she's gone, boy, she's gone. I found her trail in Memphis, but she just walked up the block. She raised a few eyebrows and then she went on down alone. Now, won't you batter down by Baton Rouge, River Queen, roll it on. Take that woman on down to New Orleans, New Orleans. Go on, I've had enough; dump my blues down in the gulf. She loves you, Big River, more than me. Now I taught the weeping willow how to cry, cry, cry And I showed the clouds how to cover up a clear blue sky. And the tears that I cried for that woman are gonna flood you Big River. Then I'm gonna sit right here until I die. Quote: " Siddhartha had wanted to drown; in it the old, tired despairing Siddhartha had drowned that day. But the new Siddhartha felt a profound love for that flowing water, and resolved in his mind not to leave it behind for quite some time," (54). Analysis: This song goes along with this quote in a way. The song is talking about finding someone. Siddhartha throughout the whole book has been looking for himself. The river is a huge symbol in the book. Siddhartha always goes to it, when he is low. The first time Siddhartha say "tired despairing Siddhartha had drowned that day," (54) Siddhartha feels like the river changed him and let the old Siddhartha die and the new Siddhartha rise.