KendraScrabook7

=Kendra's Self-Realization Scrapbook=

The Assignment
To get a feeling for how the Samanas, Indian ascetics that are found in the novel //Siddhartha//, try to reach enlightenment, we gave up something we enjoy for a week. I chose to give up snacks (no more than one), because it's technically not something I **need**. Technically.



The Beginning
I started my fasting journey on Friday October 12. Everyday I bring a big snack for school that contains various items so I won't get hungry. I decided to limit myself to no snacks or one snack a day. My challenge was similar to Siddhartha's in that "He only ate once a day and never cooked food / He fasted for fourteen days" (Hesse 13). It was pretty difficult the first day trying to adjust to not having the same amount if food with me all day long. Even at home, if I had already had eaten my snack of the day, I was begging my mom to make dinner. I don't know how it could happen but the second day was even worse because it was the start of the weekend. When you are at home with free access to food it makes your goal really difficult to focus on.

The Middle [[image:http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_vc4yNEP-cj8/TMJXs6AzPmI/AAAAAAAAC5M/3YaZu8l1y6Q/s1600/nausea_smiley.jpg width="168" height="161" align="right"]]
I was glad it was Sunday even though I was going back to school the next day, I did not have to worry about food tempting me all day long. On Sunday I had one meal the whole day in the middle of the day. My family went to go visit my grandmother and we ate with her a Shakers around noon. On Monday I was back at school and still fighting to keep my commitment. People who know me and know how I eat started to test me and ask if I could do it. So in a way I had many "enemies and doubters" (21) like Gotama. I still did not have enough energy to carry myself through my practices and saw myself having a lot of sicknesses. But I kept my head high and went on as accordingly during practices.

The End
As it became closer to the end of my week I started to gain a lot of confidence because I had already made it through the tough part. Another thing I realized, though, its that eating food had an effect on my food. I found myself getting very moody as the week came to an end. Exhaustion started to catch up with me in my daily routine. I was still be tested by my peers who were putting food in my face endlessly. I constantly found myself saying to a person "it gives you pleasure to mock me" (22) as people made jokes about my challenge. To prove myself on the last day I decided to have no snacks for the whole day. I felt like a hungry hippo with no balls to devour. What made it worse is that I had powerpuff on that Thursday evening. In the end I conquered my self-deprivation assignment. REFLECTIONS: Giving up something someone does everyday is hard because it is breaking a routine that one has established. What made my task even more difficult is the fact that I work out everyday. I learned that I have a level of self-discipline that I didn't even know about. I don't think I would have been able to do this for a long period of time because of the toll this process has taken on my body. I would definitely not want to do it either because eating is very important during my basketball season.

[[image:Kendra H..jpg]]
Siddhartha reached awakening after he left the grove where the Buddha lived. When he left the grove "he felt that he left his former life behind him in the grove" (37). His mind was filled with thoughts and reflections and he came up with many realizations. In his awakening he saw the world as beautiful, strange and mysterious. To him, awkakening felt like "the world around him melted away, when he stood alone like a star in the heavens" (41). That is why I drew a melting world and a bright star in the night sky at the top of my paper. When saw the world after being awakened, he saw blue, yellow, and green. Also Siddhartha saw rivers, skies, and mountains which I also incorporated into my awakening picture. Siddhartha's "awakening" differed from reaching the enlightenment because Siddhartha saw the world as beautiful and wonderful whereas enlightenment recognized the world as containing suffering and releasing your Self to escape.

Kamala
**Name:** Kamala
 * Location:** The Pleasure Grove (52)


 * Eyes:** Dark Brown


 * Hair:** Choclate brown

I am not conceited, but I feel as if I have gained the gift of beauty in my life. I saw a guy named Siddhartha. He seemed really fascinated by me because of my beauty. He wishes to be my friend and learn about the pleasures of love from me. I am a very well known courtesan which is like a prostitute but for wealthier clientele. Many young men, usually Brahmins, come and want my services. Right now, I spend my days with Siddhartha teaching him about love and guidance. Otherwise I am in my grove lying in my sedan chair relaxing. I want a man who has nice clothes, nice shoes, and lots of money. Siddhartha is a clever man, but he is lacking all three aspects. He has shoes and clothes, but he needs fine shoes and clothes. I sent him to a wealthy merchant to help him gain knowledge on how to make money.
 * About Me:**
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My Daily Life
1. Wake Up 2. Go to school 3. Go to sports' practice 4. Do Homework 5. Watch TV 6. Eat dinner

The Quote
"Siddhartha had learned how to transact business affairs, to exercise power over people, to amuse himself with women; he had learned to wear fine clothes, to command servants, to bathe in sweet-smelling waters. He had learned to eat sweet and carefully prepared foods, also fish and meat and fowl, spices and dainties, and to drink wine which made him lazy and forgetful"(77).

The Analysis
My routine starts around 6:30...6:40 where I wake up and start to get ready for school. I hate having to waking up and my mom says I am acting childish when I complain in the mornings. But I think that over my lifetime I am like Siddhartha because I have "acquired some of the characteristics of [the] ordinary people"(77). Any ordinary person would not want to wake up that early. The reason I wake up so early is because I live in Crozet and have to catch a bus to Albemarle at my mom's work. I take the bus to school drop my sports bag off in the locker room and start m school. No matter what day it is in the week I feel that school takes forever to get through, especially on Mondays. After school I have practice and that makes my day fell even longer. After basketball I come home and do homework for a couple of hours, then relax for the rest of the night until dinner. At dinner its my mom, dad, and I eating around the table since my sister is away at college. I think my routine has a positive effect on my life because of all the people I affect in my life. When I play basketball I am able to become a leader because I am in my own element when I play. My team is like a second family to me and are very influential. Sometimes I get caught up in my relationship because I want to talk to that person which throws off my routine.

The River
media type="youtube" key="DksSPZTZES0" height="315" width="560"

**Song: "Cry Me A River" by Justin Timberlake**
"Now there's just no chance for you and me You're not with me Don't it make you sad about it" "The same night Siddhartha left his garden and the town and never returned. For a long time Kamaswami tried to find him, believing he had fallen into the hands of bandits. Kamala did not try to find him. She was not surprised when she learned that Siddhartha had disappeared."(Hesse 85). This song is really old, but it it still a good song. It was one of the first songs I thought of when I had to find a river song. The connection between the quote and the lyrics that both Siddhartha and Justin had to leave someone they were starting to fall in love with. Siddhartha did not like the way his life was going so he had to leave the garden. "There [was] just no chance" for Siddhartha and Kamala because he was staring to become more like ordinary people around him. The surprising thing was that Kamala "was not surprised when she learned that Siddhartha had disappeared" (85) because it seemed that she was not "sad' about it and was expecting it to happen.
 * Lyrics:**
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media type="youtube" key="tipw66XjXn4" height="315" width="420" "And it gets stronger, in every way And it gets deeper, let me say And it gets higher, day by day" "His sleep was deep and dreamless; he had not slept like that for a long time. When he awakened after many hours, it seemed to him as if ten years had passed. He heard the soft rippling of the water; he did not know where he was nor what had brought him there."(Hesse 90) When I was looking for songs to use for this part of the project this song came up and I knew the artist so I decided to use it. This again is a song about love, but it can be connected to Siddhartha in other ways.Tina is singing about her love growing for a person which is similar to the Om growing inside of the Siddhartha. Sitting next to river he had a transformation while sleeping and "...on awakening he looked at the world like a new man"(90). After this experience Siddhartha wanted to learn a lot more from the river and have guidance from the ferryman.
 * Song: "River Deep Mountain High" by Ike and Tina Turner**
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media type="youtube" key="EGBXIK5TZjs" height="315" width="420" "Remember the day I set you free I told you you could always count on me From that day on, I made a vow, I'll be there when you want me, Some way, Some how." "But Siddhartha went outside and sat in front of the hut all night, listening to the river, sunk in the past, simultaneously affected and encompassed by all the periods of his life. From time to time, however, he rose, walked to the door of the hut and listened to hear if the boy was sleeping"(Hesse 114). This is one of my favorite old school songs. I used to sing it all the time with my mom when I was younger. Basically the song is about being there for the people you love no matter what the obstacle may be. I feel as if Siddhartha would have taken care of Kamala if she had of survived the snake bite because I believe that he loved her even though he said he never experienced that emotion. When Kamala was lying in his bed in pain "Siddhartha read the pain on her mouth,... sharing her pain"(113). If someone can empathize with someone else, they share a deep connection. And everyone knows Kamala loves Siddhartha because "she thought she was dreaming"(112) when she saw him hovering over her while she was lying in bed.
 * Song: "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell**
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The Om
Journey to Enlightenment

//Siddhartha// by Herman Hesse is a about a young man and his journey to reaching peace. He leaves his family at a young age because he feels that he is lacking something of impotance. He joins the ascetics, but soon leaves them to live a worldly life that eventually sickens him. After leaving the town SIddhartha comes to river and hears the sound of the Om that signals the beginning of his new life. In this story is said that four characters reached enlightenment during the story, the four being Gotama, SIddhartha, Govinda, and Vasudeva. Three out of the four characrers, SIddhartha, Govinda, and Vasudeva, experienced enlightenment from things of the world while Gotama found enlightenment outside of the world. Two important themes that relative to this analysis is inner guidance vs. outer guidance.

Siddhartha started out seeking enlightenment through the life of an ascetic, but unfortunately did not find it there. He went on to meet the Illustrious One who told him of the Buddhist way of releasing the Self and ending all suffering. But Siddhartha did not want to become a follower of Gotama because he could thoroughly explain what the Self was. After leaving his dearest friend behind he set out on his journey to finding himself, and along the way stop at a town a learned ways of ordinary people. Again his search for guidance from people to reach enlightenment this being Kamala and the merchant he stayed with during this time. After the constant routine and the diminishing of days, Siddhartha decided to take off and leave because his everyday life sickened him. He met up with the ferryman and sought guidance from the river. In the river he heard voices "... the whole, the unity; then the great song of a thousand voices consisted of the world: Om--- perfection" (Hesse 136), which gave him the peace inside he was looking for. As one can see, Siddhartha received his enlightenment from the things of the world and outside guidance. HIs teachers and teachings led to the development of thinking that made Siddhartha to make it to his peaceful realm.

Govinda started his journey with Siddhartha when Siddhartha was a Brahmin. He was a main follower of Siddhartha when they traveled together because he believed that Siddhartha was a very wise person. Govinda can be characterized as a faithful companion because he was always closely connected to Siddhartha even when they went their separate ways. There were a couple times when Siddhartha and Govinda met back up like when Govinda watched over Siddhartha as he was sleeping and when he visited him as ferryman. When Govinda went to visit Siddhartha as a ferryman, Siddhartha taught him of his enlightment and the keys to teachings, illusions, and love which was a key symbol of the book. "Govinda stood yet a while bending over Siddhartha's peaceful face which he had kissed"(Hesse 151), he saw many things that transformed him instantly after making contact with Siddhartha. Again, he experience the finding of peace from an oustide guidance.

Vasudeva's story is different is different from that of Govinda's and Siddhartha. It seemed that he was somewhat wise from the beginning where Siddhartha and him met each other. His characterization would be a mentor because he taught Siddhartha the way of the river. He could also be characterized as being a caretaker because after Siddhartha returned from his journey into the town he let Siddhartha stay in his hut. Vasudeva found enlightenment through long years spent near the river and he helped Siddhartha come to the realization of the Om. After his experience with Siddhartha he went into the woods with a accomplished heart. His years of being a ferryman was now over and it was time for a new beginning for him.

Lastly, there is Gotama who's story was unique also, but very similar to Siddhartha's in the beginning. He also left his rich home to join a group of ascetics that he learned many key talents though seemingly irrelevant. Before entering the world that surrounded him, Gotama learned about pain and suffering and wanted to find a way to end the constant cycle that humans go through. The god, Mara, sent Gotama a lot of temptations to make him go on a tangent from his main goal. His last task was to defeat his Self and overcome his ego. After accomplishing this goal he reached enlightenment and learned the art of compassion. After becoming enlightened Gotama went around telling his teachings which "...its goal is salvation from suffering/That is what Gotama teaches nothing else"(Hesse 33).

How the characters found enlightenmet affected what they viewed as enlightenment. The different paths each character took made their enlightment unique to their situation. The big difference in enlightment was the accepting of worldly things and the rejecting of worldly things. Siddhartha, Govinda, and Vasudeva all found enlightenment through the things that the world had brought to them whether it be teachings, people, or certain objects, but none of them saw enlightenment in the exact same way. Gotama found enlightenment through releasing the Self and rejecting worldy the things because by doing this he believed you could end all suffering of the world.